*PrEtTy NhiLs*

"TrUe LoVe CaNnOt Be FoUnD WhErE It DoEs Not Exist nOr CaNnOt Be HiDdEn WhErE It TrUlY DoEs"

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

happy birthday to me!

happy birthday to me
happy birthday to me
happy birthday, happy birthday
happy birthday to me...

yeah, 20 mins to go and its no longer my bday...

do i make any sense here?

oh well... birthday blues... blues and more blues...

jerry... wish you were here...( sniff*)

Saturday, March 25, 2006

We're not even friends!

I've been getting these forwarded messages from a certain person ( i didn't save the number though but I am very much familiar with the number) it wasn't as constant as everyday but frankly, I am getting upset because the content of the texts are of the same meaning ( don't wanna tell what are those ) but really, this is getting into my nerves lately.
Hey, We're not friends, we're not even close, you haven't met me yet, you just know me by name. So what's this huh?! You don't know me, you dont even know what's happening to me, you dont know what you're sending me. I just don't get it why do you have to send me texts like that! By doing it, you only make me think that you're still in doubt. Aren't you happy? What are you trying to say? What message are you trying to send me? Are you still threatened? Im not going to take away your "one and only love", Iyong-iyo siya! Duh! I don't bother you, so stop bugging me, okay? Spare me from this crap of yours!!!
Get a life!
I've got my own, so start making yours!

Saturday, March 04, 2006

i choose to be happy

And all the attachments I have with this world of ours maybe of nosense at all, I choose to reflect on the attachments of my physical body to my spiritual soul and heart. And I want happiness to stay in my heart forever. For I refuse to be lonely. Even if everybody seems to come and go, I will always have a piece of him other inside me.
And I have this weird feeling that everything happens for a reason. Even the loneliest of events happens for a very good reason. I choose to believe. For I choose to be happy.
I will never ever dwell on my past mistakes but rather learn and go on. For I've loved and lost, lived and learned. But still, I won't give up. For I refuse to be lonely. And though I cry today, I refuse to cry forever. For my soul wasn't meant to be lonely.
I maybe alone at the moment, but not for long. This I know. And somebody may come again and destined to leave anyway. I wouldn't care. For the fact of the matter is, I will keep myself intact. He will never leave with the whole of me. But I will celebrate the emotions I felt, for I am human. And I refuse to be lonely. And I detach from it all for it is a hateful world. But I refuse to hate. Love is what I should feel for every molecule and every particle in this universe.
And I maybe senseless. I am meaningless. But I refuse to make myself trivial, for I am significant. These words have no meaning. No sense, no direction. And though my refusal is futile, I will never give up.
I choose to be happy.
- anonymous-

Saturday, February 04, 2006

wowowee tragedy...

From the supposedly 1st year anniversary celebration of wowowee in ULtra, it turned out to be a nightmare...a tragedy... Nobody wants this to happen and it is so sad that inspite of what happened we can still hear negative words or putting the blame on others...instead, let us give symphaty to those who are grieving for the loss of their loved ones...let's pray and hope this will not happen again...
again, my condolonce....
and so when i went to baywalk for our PBB celebrity edition launching, i was not surprised anymore when they told us that they are moving it to sunday 9pm to give way and respect the mournings of the "wowowee tragedy".


here are some quotes to ponder.. this may sound like a cliche' already, but everything is true... (",)

1. Lovin' him was one thing I was afraid of..
I was right,
It hurts... But i thank him anyway coz i learned to let go...
He taught me what love really is.
And I know it was NEVER him.

2. don't let false love fool you,
but don't let real love pass you by,
coz d easy aprt of life is finding someone to love,
the hard part is...
finding someone to love you back..

3. Your heart hides what you cant say
but your eyes say what your heart tries to to hide.
It would hurt less to hear a sounding goodbye
than hear a stay and
see in the eye that it was a LIE.

4. If you lose love, that doenst mean that you failed in love.
Cry if you have to,
But make sure that the tears wash away the hurt and the bitterness
that the past has left you with.

5. It's not easy to let go of something you've put everything .
But it's harder to realized later on
that the you've been holdin' on to somethin'
that wasn't there...anymore.

6. I have come to realize
that he's just a guy...one great maybe...
but he's not mine...
I don't need to do things to make him love me...
cuz if he wanted to...
he would.

7. No guy is worth a girl's tears...
the only one who's worth your tears
is the one who knows eh could...
but would never ever...
make you cry...

8. when you love,
you thought you would never get tired.
You thought it would nver end.
but sometimes, you need to be tired to realize
that love too can end..
especially if it wasnt meant...

9. Is it right to to cry for someone who would nver care for you?
To give attention to someone who dont know you exist?
To love someone who can never love you back?
Is it worth all the pain?
or Is it time for you to let go?

10. we may love the wrong person
and cry for the wrong reason, but no matter how things go wrong
one thing is sure,
MISTAKES... help us find,
the right people meant for us...

Sunday, January 29, 2006

5 missed calls!

I was in deep sleep but the loud ring of my phone woke me up! i looked at the clock beside my bed and realized it was 130am! i checked it and I know it was an overseas call ( CALL lang kasi nag-appear)... Partly, i know who it was, but since i was half asleep, i still answered the call...

ME: hello...? ( sound asleep)
HIM: i-m really sorry.... ( it was his first sentence.)
... suddenly... his voice woke me up totally...my heart beat faster, not because I was excited but because the last thing he did to me came rushing through my mind, and I wanna yell at him! but I decided not to say anything...I kept quiet for the succeeding seconds... we were idle for a moment or two and he keeps saying hello and mentioning my name.. checking if i'm still there...after 15 - 20 seconds of thinking whether I should talk to him or not, whether i should say a word, I finally got the courage to drop and hung up the phone... He called again...and I didnt answer...and so he texted me...

HIM: ...I'm really sorry sweety, please don't be mad at me...
( huh?! HUWATT?!!!...calling me sweety pa huh? he's still got the nerve to call me that? )

I put the phone underneath my pillow...and after a minute, he was calling again...when it stopped, i activated my voicemail... he called again for the 5th time, but I never answered the phone...I tried to go back to sleep, but I failed... because he woke me up and I was mad again...Damn!!! ...He left a voicemail instead.

You're asking for "understanding"...how can you ask for something you dont even know the meaning of it?... how can you ask for something you have never shown? ... tsk tsk tsk!!! some people never change.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Work saved me...

after how many weeks that i wasnt able to update my blog, here i am now...I know it's been awhile and some of my regular visitors here are bragging me already to update this...

Christmas was not really outrageous, hahaha! but i was glad that I spent most of my time with family and with some friends. Something happened before and after Christmas (dont wanna go into details anymore).

I told myself not to tell it even sa blog.. i just dont want anyone or i guess, for HIM to read this.. i dont want him to have any idea of what is inside me or any reasons that might give him any clues because, i promised that i would nver talk to him nor communicate with him anymore... DEADMA na ako for the meantime... im not ready yet for any talks!...( hala! siguro, for my visitors, obviously you would think that something happened - and its pretty bad for me...)

and thank God that i was pre-occupied and got myself stucked sa work to atleast avoid his thoughts...hmp!...

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

this one's for you!

to all you guys out there who are insensitive.. this one's for you!!!
you're great! for taking a role like this!
How do you cool your lips
After a summer's kiss
How do you rid the sweat After the body bliss
How do you turn your eyes From the romantic glare
How do you block the sound of a voice You'd know anywhere

Oh I really should have known
By the time you drove me home
By the vagueness in your eyes
Your casual good-byes
By the chill in your embrace
The expression on your face
That told me you might have
some advice to give
On how to be insensitive

How do you numb your skin After the warmest touch
How do you slow your blood
After the body rush How do you free your soul
After you've found a friend
How do you teach your heart it's a crime
To fall in love again

Oh you probably won't remember me
It's probably ancient history
I'm one of the chosen few
Who went ahead and fell for you I'm out of vogue,
I'm out of touch I fell too fast,
I feel too much I thought that you might have some advice to give
On how to be insensitive [chorus