"SELF - ACTUALIZATION"

I'm still in chapter 3 of the book ate Elena gave me as her bday present for me. The book is entitled "You are what you think"...when she handed it to me, i said, oh great, maybe this is something I can read in times of boredom...but I never thought it will have a great impact on me. I admit that lately and maybe most of you who read my blog, would notice that I was feeling depressed lately. It's pretty obvious i know!

Two nights ago, I was dwelling on this thought, about what happened during my dinner with this old friend of mine. And i felt I did a wrong thing for allowing myself to feel the same thing I had with him from the previous months of silence. And his thoughts keep haunting me whenever silence would visit me especially on silent nights. Believe me or not, but I know most of us who are experiencing frustrations and depressions would sink in to that emotions, instead of pulling ourselves out of that feeling, sometimes we feel the urge to think and be a slave of that certain helpless thought. Most often than not, we have this belief that the more we think of that person or that situation, the more we can help ourselves to overcome the tragedies of depression. I used to think that way too...If wer'e sad, we like to be more sad, if we have broken up with our boyfriends, we would cry ourselves out, we would lock ourselves inside our room, we go to places which would remind us more of the person who is the cause of our suffering, and sometimes, we would listen to our favorite songs, sad songs that would trigger the pain we are feeling at that moment. Funny and weird it may seem for us and for everybody, but that's the reality. We would like to kill ourselves with this thought, keep remembering and play over and over again in our minds the painful scenes we had...And the BIG question now is that, does it help us overcome the pain? does it help ourselves to make us whole again? does it help us find ourselves again? does it make us better? NO! it does tear us apart...many questions to deal with, but we don't have a choice but to deal with it right?... I know, for a time we have to cry it out to lessen the pain and for us to feel much better but its not healthy if we keep bragging about the sad things that happened to us. It is only us who can help ourselves to move on and forget about everything...I realized while I was reading this book, nobody can help us get through with the painful experiences but US...it's just a matter of choice. Life is a matter of choice. If we're sad, we have the choice if we want to be sad and stay sad, on the other hand, if we're happy, it is our choice why we're happy. It is just as simple as learning to deal with it. This may sound like a cliche, but this is true " mind over matter" lang yan!... we should not let ourselves be taken by the sadness or loneliness we are feeling but we should know how to be the master of our own self and let the mind dictate what is right and what is wrong, its just being rational...dwelling on how lonely you are makes you feel more lonely. It is in knowing on the matters of letting go and letting God - Amen to that!

From the previous nights, I would like to say thank you to Joebel, Thelma and Leah who accompanied me that night by texting me and giving me advices...

I just wanna post those texts that helped me to realize a lot of things:

JOEBEL SAYS: its a matter of believing lang and holding on. Kung mas matagal kang mag-hold on. mas masasaktan ka. But if you would just think that you would open your heart and mind to someone new, things would be better, 1 thing I've learned, kahit anong novena pa gawin mo, kahit anong pagpapaka-martyr ka pa, kahit anong i-promise mo kay God, kung di para sayo, di para syo. Ibig sabihin may mas better pa...

LEAH SAYS: I was once told that we need to feel different kinds of emotions in order to learn how to deal. Sabi pa, since now, your feeling sad, let yourself be, but learn to detach yourself from it so that you'll be able to feel happy again.Life cycles, ti sucks but it happens.

THELMA SAYS: kelan ko lang na-prove na once minahal mo ang isang tao, di mawawala yun, nasa sayo na lang desisyon if itutuloy mo or tatanggapin mo na di siya talaga for you. Walang ibang makakatulong syo kundi ikaw lang. But you dont have to force yourself...

Thanks to you girls!

and thanks for the book which was a big help that night. It made me realized a lot of things to have a new vision in life, new perception and a new HEART!

...A while ago, my good friend Jerte, texted me that he told my realizations to a psychologist who happened to be in the hospital where he is accompanying Ate Elena and consulted about my situation, and according to the doctor, it is "SELF-ACTUALIZATION" and I am in the HIGHEST PYRAMID LEVEL, hehehe! nice doc!... I am happy about it!